Daughter, Thy Faith Hath Made Thee Whole (March 23, 2023)

My husband prepared to put his hands on her head. He asked our daughter what she felt she needed.

She softly said, “Strength. Courage. Determination.”

And, “Not to be afraid.”

—

Books I never thought I’d read rest on my nightstand. Screenshots of websites I never expected I’d Google are saved on my phone. Posts from support groups I never imagined I’d join fill my social media. And strange acronyms have made their way into my everyday vocabulary. ED, AN, FBT, WR++, OCD, CBT, ERP…

ERP- exposure & response prevention- is the gold standard for treating obsessive compulsive disorder- which, spoiler alert! is NOT about being clean & organized! I had NO idea how debilitating & horrible & misunderstood it can be.

ERP deliberately exposes someone to the very fears that are causing their intrusive thoughts in order for them to practice resisting the compulsions/rituals they’ve developed to cope with those thoughts.

Though this therapy of invoking terror/anxiety feels counter-intuitive, it has the power to rewire the brain & is one of the best chances at managing OCD.

It takes Strength. Courage. Determination. Not to be afraid.

The woman with the issue of blood “had suffered many things of many physicians, & had spent all that she had, & was nothing bettered, but rather grew worse” (Mark 5:26)

Pure faith carried her to the hem of His garment. With strength, courage, determination, she reached out & touched.

And He knew.

She vulnerably came forward, “fearing & trembling… fell down before him, & told him all the truth.” (33)

And He saw a woman that society had not seen for 12 years. He called her “daughter” when society had likely called her “outcast.”

“Daughter, thy faith​ hath made thee whole” (34)

Faith: Trusting in a process we can’t physically see, in a process that doesn’t always make sense, in a process that can look scarier before it looks better.

But in one act of courage, she threw herself into the very crowd who rejected her, followed Him, & trusted.

—

The one I call daughter is also reaching out, trusting, in doctors, in medicine,

In her parents,

In God.

Incredibly vulnerable.

Not asking for much- just a hem.

But perhaps a hem is enough.