Wilt Thou Be Made Whole?: Day 8

On the 8th day of Christmas, Christ gave me… Healing.

For the woman with the issue of blood it was 12 years.

For the afflicted man waiting at the pool of Bethesda it was 38.

Six years doesn’t seem like much in comparison. But during those 6 years I pled to be healed.

I struggled with horrible body image starting at age 14.

I thought I could fix it.

So I made myself throw up off & on for years.

As you can imagine, this brought NOTHING good into my life. It drew me into a dark place of obsessive thoughts & actually fed the demons I was trying so hard to destroy. 

Instead of "fixing" me, it was breaking me.

Yet I couldn’t stop

I prayed & prayed & didn’t know why God wasn’t taking it away from me.

It is painful to remember.

But I don't want to forget.

Because this is a story about overcoming. A story about healing.

I don’t recognize that girl anymore.

There is a line in the show “The Chosen.” After being healed, Mary Magdalene says, “I was one way, & now I am completely different. And the thing that happened in between… was Him.”

That is how I feel.

I am completely different.

What happened in between… was Him.

Long story short- not much changed on the outside, but EVERYTHING changed on the inside.

It took 6 years to grab the hem of His garment with all my might so He could lift me out of the hole for good. To KNOW I have worth, a worth NOT based on a number on the scale.

I was free.

Christ healed palsy, blindness, dumbness, leprosy, paralysis, fevers, blood disease. He cast out devils, calmed seas, rose the dead!

He healed “all manner of ​​​sickness​ & all manner of disease among the ​​​people” (Matt 4:23)

He still does.

He casts out our demons, opens our eyes, our mouths. He makes us clean, helps us rise & walk. Awakens us from sleep. Calms our storms.

He asks, “Wilt thou be made whole?” (John 5:6)

My life isn’t perfect. I have other ailments, to be sure. But experiencing the disappearance of the tormented thoughts associated with disordered eating is a miracle to me.

Total healing may take place now. It may take place later. But I know it can take place. In the meantime, He is my Physician, my balm in Gilead. And I will be made whole.